The Darkness: Zhang Chaoyang's Retreat from the Empire He Built
Key Takeaways
- The reality that immense wealth and success do not grant immunity from mental health struggles.
- The importance of recognizing burnout and having the courage to step away.
- How a period of crisis and introspection can lead to a more authentic and sustainable approach to life and work.
- The unique pressures faced by high-profile leaders and the toll of living a public life.
Imagine this: You are one of China's most famous entrepreneurs. You are wealthy, successful, and a household name. Your life is the envy of millions. Yet, beneath this dazzling halo, your world is silently collapsing. Wealth brings you no joy, and success feels meaningless. You are sinking into a severe depression and anxiety, even experiencing a "feeling of impending doom."
What do you do? Do you continue to wear the mask of a "winner" in public, forcing a smile until you are completely broken? Or do you make a decision that requires immense courage: admit your vulnerability to the world, step away from the empire you built, and "disappear" from public view to embark on a long and painful journey of self-healing?
In 2011, Zhang Chaoyang chose the latter. He began a two-year "retreat," transforming from a star in the spotlight into a patient battling his inner darkness.
What you'll learn from this story:
- The reality that immense wealth and success do not grant immunity from mental health struggles.
- The importance of recognizing burnout and having the courage to step away.
- How a period of crisis and introspection can lead to a more authentic and sustainable approach to life and work.
- The unique pressures faced by high-profile leaders and the toll of living a public life.
"I Had Everything, but I Was in Pain"
Around 2011, Zhang Chaoyang's life seemed perfect. Although Sohu was no longer the sole hegemon after the portal wars, it was still one of China's internet giants. He personally possessed immense wealth and supreme fame. But his inner world had become a wasteland.
In later interviews, he candidly described his state at the time: "I had everything, but I was just in so much pain."
The vanity and thrill of success no longer gave him any stimulation. He became anxious, sleepless, and lost interest in everything. More seriously, he began to experience symptoms of panic attacks, his mind often filled with terrifying thoughts that made him feel like "the sky was falling."
He realized he was sick. The root cause was years of accumulated stress, the fear of failure, and the larger-than-life persona of the "celebrity CEO." He had been living for the expectations of others for so long that he had forgotten what he truly wanted. His life was like a rubber band stretched to its absolute limit, ready to snap at any moment.
The Two-Year Disappearance
After struggling in a mire of pain for a long time, Zhang Chaoyang made a stunning decision: he would completely "let go."
From 2011 to 2013, he almost entirely vanished from public and corporate view. He stopped giving media interviews, attending public events, and rarely even went to the office. He handed over the management of the company to a committee and embarked on a "wandering" journey to find himself.
During these two years, he tried various methods to heal. He went to the United States for psychotherapy. He traveled to many parts of the world, hoping to broaden his perspective. He also read extensively on psychology and Eastern philosophy, learning how to get along with his own mind.
The process was extremely difficult. He described himself as a "shattered vase" that needed to be glued back together piece by piece. He had to relearn how to feel joy, how to manage stress, and how to coexist with the real version of himself, who was no longer a "star."
He later concluded that the root of his illness was his flawed perception of "success." He once thought that success meant being more famous and wealthier than others. But when he finally had it all, he discovered that it did not bring lasting happiness.
Returning with "Humility"
When Zhang Chaoyang re-emerged in the public eye in 2013, people noticed a change.
The once flamboyant and spotlight-loving celebrity CEO was gone. In his place was a more introverted, peaceful, and even humble middle-aged man. He no longer talked about the glitz of the celebrity world, but began to speak of "responsibility" and "duty."
This retreat marked a complete transformation in his life. He was no longer obsessed with "winning," but began to think about how to be a "person of value."
His management style also changed. He returned to the company, becoming deeply involved in the details of products and operations. He began to emphasize discipline and diligence, leading by example, sleeping only four hours a night and maintaining a high-intensity work schedule.
More importantly, he no longer shied away from talking about his darkest period. He openly shared his story of battling depression with the media and the public, hoping to help others in similar situations.
From heaven to hell, and back to the world of the living. Zhang Chaoyang's "retreat" was not just a personal salvation but also a profound case study for the Chinese entrepreneurial community: how to confront inner fragility and truth while pursuing business success, and ultimately find a path to peace and lasting meaning.
Key Takeaways
- Success is Not a Vaccine for Suffering: Zhang's story is a powerful testament to the fact that external achievements—fame, wealth, power—do not protect against internal struggles like depression and anxiety.
- The Courage to Be Vulnerable: In a culture that often prizes strength, Zhang's decision to publicly admit his struggles and step away was an act of immense courage. It showed that true strength lies in acknowledging one's own vulnerability.
- A Retreat Can Be a Reset: His two years away were not a vacation but a painful, necessary reset. The crisis forced him to deconstruct his identity and his definition of success, ultimately leading to a more authentic and sustainable way of living.
- From Ego to Duty: The core of his transformation was a shift from an ego-driven pursuit of fame to a purpose-driven fulfillment of duty. He found that lasting meaning comes not from what you get, but from what you contribute.